The good, the bad, the ugly - all of my recorded sexual thoughts & actions in print for posterity. I think that's a good thing (?).
But really, you should check this book out - not because of my content (if you come here you've read all of that already) but because it's a wonderful compilation of amazing talent, sordid tales & stimulating kink.
I thoroughly enjoyed every bit and am quite honored to be included among such interesting, witty, talented, funny and all-around remarkable lovers of sex & fun.
In other words, buy this book!
Forgive the long absence, loyal fans - the nympho has been recovering from serious surgery. But I'm back - and better than ever.
As I currently appear to going through a phase in my sex life that I like to term "the Sahara-Fucking Desert" I must come up with new things to post here for you all. It's just no fun for me going months without posting, and, I'd imagine, even less fun for those of you that come to read about my sex life regularly.
In lieu of actual sex, I've decided to add a new category to the fray - "Carnal Contemplations". This is simply thoughts I've conjured that are of a sexual nature. I may not be getting sex regularly but that doesn't mean I don't think about it 24/7.
Some may be mini-fantasies, some just a seductive sentence or two. The point is just that I don't need to be having sex to be thinking about it; and also, of course, to have another facet of my sexuality and sexual life to share with all of you.
I've been thinking of adding another category as well - one focused primarily on my drawn-out fantasies (my "erotic fiction"), but I haven't decided if that's where I want to go with all of this. What do you think? Would you like to read my fantasies as well as stories about my actual sex life - or would you prefer it all be real, the simple journal of a real-life nympho? I'd love to hear your thoughts - email me or comment, please. My decision will be based on your responses.
With that, I'm out for now. Kinky dreams to all.
My first boyfriend and I lived together for four years and had the wildest sex life I've had with anyone to date. We were both nymphos, and kinky ones at that with an open approach to sex that was as healthy as it was fun. We'd try just about anything once, and neither of us had any hang-ups about experiencing pleasure in whatever form it could be found. In other words, we were/are both bisexual.
For those that don't know it, there is something absolutely amazing about bisexual men, and women that think it's too-unmasculine or consider it an unattractive thought are truly missing out. Perhaps it's that I've always been so comfortable with my own sexuality, knowing I was attracted to women long before I was ever attracted to men and accepting it without much thought or worry. I jokingly referred to myself as a "dyke who likes dick" for some time. Whatever the case, I have always been drawn to bisexual or effeminate men. This became clear to me only after a guy I had the hots for, a close friend of my boyfriend and I's, turned out to be a cross-dresser. We, being regular and full-time freaks, were the first people this man had ever confessed his secret to and we joyfully helped him go out shopping after that for dresses and wigs; it was fun. I've heard that today he lives somewhere out in California as a full-time Dominatrix; and as a woman. That was the first time I noticed a pattern in the men I was attracted to.
My current boyfriend is the only straight man I've ever dated - and while he's all man, he still falls somewhere in the middle; probably more metrosexual than anything though I hate to use the term b/c it's been so over-used. I had hoped he'd turn out, after all, to be into men - but he's as straight as an arrow. Hey, you can't win all the time.
Most of my female friends are confused by my love of bisexual men. They can't imagine dating a man who is into other men - who's, basically, half or almost gay. The idea they have in their heads, I'm sure, is of some foppish, flaming individual who is a total bottom. Nothing could be further from the truth. To me, a bisexual man is a true hedonist - a man so into carnal bliss and the heights of pleasure that he is open and willing to experience it in any form - whether it be making love to a female or another male. A man so comfortable in his sexuality that he can love and fuck either sex without sending his own mind into a state of turmoil is an exceptional individual - especially in the society we live in today where's it's just becoming "slightly" okay to be gay and completely looked down upon by almost everyone to be male and bisexual (from straight to gay people). I can't think of a single thing more erotic than seeing my man, my normally strong and manly man, succumbing to the taboo pleasure of another man's touch.
The men I've dated that are bisexual have been amazing lovers. Never will you find a straight man (my present one included) so in touch with feminine desires and needs. I've never met a straight man that was as sensual as the bisexual lovers I have had (and I've had my share of both). I'm not saying there are not totally straight men out there that are in touch with their feminine sides and are sensual and adept lovers; just that the majority of the ones I've come across were not. There is something intriguing about a man that can be attracted to other men - something dark and mysterious and erotic; to know they are so into sex, such lovers of pure pleasure that they would seek out in any form. That is a man this nympho can get into.
My best friend once said of me, "You're the only person I know who proudly displays their vibrator in their soap dish."
I really believe this had more to do with the fact that I'm rather lazy than anything related to my unquenchable thirst for all things sexual. Still, while it may not be evidence that I am a true nympho (but am a slovenly housekeeper), it certainly is an indication of my sacred bath time ritual.
When I was a young teen, I spent many hours masturbating - more than once a day, too. I often daydreamed of when I'd be a grown woman and how I would have the most amazing collection of sex toys; especially vibrators. I was fascinated with vibrators even though I'd never seen an actual one outside of the local Spencer's. I loved the idea of being able to have something that hummed and quaked that I could stick inside me. Now grown, I own only three vibrators and I never use them two of them. I found, once I finally began having sex, that having something that hummed and quaked inside me couldn't even compare to the soft warm harness of male flesh.
That said, while I may not have the vast sex toy assortment I hoped for as a teen, I have all I need, all any woman needs, to keep me happy. My hand-held shower massager. It's not just for showering anymore. Trust me.
Now I can't see a woman alive not enjoying the thundering rain of water pounding against her clit, but I believe masturbation via water holds an even more erotic feeling for me. My first ever experience with masturbating was in a swimming pool - lined up perfectly with the pump jets. I didn't know what I was doing, but I knew it felt good; damn good. I've been obsessed with "water sports" (no, not that kind) ever since.
So it was with much delight that I finally ordered a slim waterproof vibrator for my tub-time fun - and yes, Bubbles sits in my bathtub's soap dish. The combination of humming vibrator and pounding-water-on-clit is a sureproof cum-within-seconds orgasm for me. It has become a bath time ritual for me. Shave - bathe - wash hair - masturbate. I come out feeling completely cleansed.
I usually bathe with bubble bath and plenty of candles in the room. Sometimes I'll have a glass of wine or champagne, or just a beer. The entire time I'm in the tub, while I'm doing all of my other "cleaning duties", I'm thinking about sex. Hot, dirty, nasty, wet sex - whatever scenario fits my mood at the time. By time I get to the last part, I'm more than ready.
I turn the massager on jet-spray, the high-powered one, and tease myself with it for long moments at a time. Moving from my clit down the length of my pussy. There isn't an inch of it that doesn't love the feel of that jetstream. When I've gotten myself completely aroused and ready, I take Bubbles, turn him on, and gently slide him just inside of myself. I hold him there, barely pushing, and let the massager work its magic on my clit - the more aroused I get, the more I open up, and the more the vibrator slowly slides inside. It really doesn't take long, once that's slid in, for me to have the most amazing orgasm.
It almost beats the warm flesh of an actual cock.
Almost.
I don't normally talk about newsworthy events on this blog, but this particular headline really caught my attention. I was outraged to read about the arrest of Joanne Webb, as I'm sure many of you were. All I've read on the subject, even comments from residents of Burleson, TX, is that this is not about Joanne breaking the law, but about her obvious comfortableness (and openness) about being a sexual and sexually-charged being. That's right, folks, Joanne Webb is in hot water not because she was selling sex toys, but because the ultra conservative town she lived in couldn't stand the thought of a true-blue nympho living in their midst. Joanne is one of us - she is like the many that read these sex-fueled blogs and those who, like myself, have such a passion for sex and all its trappings that we write about it, think about it, talk about it and make it a part of our everyday lives. She's a fellow nympho - and she's being condemned for it.
I found the most interesting reading on the entire scandal at Toyslut's Weblog. The comments from the Burlesonites were most enlightening (note that none of them left an email address or URL). Go on over there and take a gander at what they had to say.
You see, basically what I get out of all that is that Joanne Webb is comfortable being sexual, which means that she can't also be a good Christian. If she "flaunts" her sexuality - wearing sexy clothing or selling sex toys - she is a disgrace to the conservative town and to God himself. It's this kind of thinking that outrages me. There is nothing wrong with being a sexual person, or expressing that side of yourself! Attitudes like this are what causes millions of people to be uncomfortable with themselves and their sexual desires. These thought processes are what makes it "wrong" to be open about your sex life, "wrong" to be gay or bisexual or transexual or whatever-sexual you may be, "wrong" to be a nympho and proud of it. They turn the beautiful thing that is sex into something dark and immoral, something to be hidden away behind closed doors and never, ever talked about. If you like sex, you might as well throw out your Bible - you're going straight to hell. If you like to talk about sex, shop at sex stores, watch porn or dress sexily - you must be Satan's spawn.
Sex is an amazing, wonderful, silly, beautiful, mind-blowing, fun, awesome thing and I can't abide by anyone that smears it, trashes it, and makes it something disgusting and unholy. Fight 'em every step of the way, Joanne - this nympho's behind you.
Life's funny sometimes.
I have another blog, a regular old-bitch-and-rant fest, my day-to-day life and gripes type of thing. I post to it almost every day. This blog, being rather subject-matter-oriented, I don't tend to post to as much. I can bitch about anything in the other blog. This blog is about sex, and I want to keep it that way. I don't get as much sex as I used to, so I tend not to post as much. I really hate that, because this was my first blog and it has a special place in my heart.
Back to the point, though. Because the other blog is a near daily-effort, I spend a small amount of time working on making it a "popular blog". It has its small, faithful ring of readers, and I'm happy with that. Afterall, why else do we create online journals if not to have others read them? I enjoy people reading my work, and I take pleasure in the fact that they enjoy what I write. I don't need a 25,000 hits + a day to be content, but to know I have at least a few returning readers makes me feel good - writing is my craft, afterall.
So I was able to hunt down a free stat counter that actually showed "keywords". I thought it would be amusing, after seeing others post similar finds, to see how people found my blog - what did they type into search engines to make me pop up? For shits and giggles, and almost as an afterthought, I added one to this blog.
Imagine my surprise to find out the next day that, even though I haven't posted in over a month, I was getting approximately 100 to 50 hits a day here. I had no idea! The point of all this is not to brag, but to say thank you!! As I poked around the stat counter I found a bevy of wonderful blogs (sexually-oriented and not) linking here to me! It made my day. It made my entire week.
Why? Because I was getting so many hits? Hardly. I was overjoyed at the fact that, well, you like me. You really like me. Not that I thought you wouldn't, but it gives me great pleasure to know that so many actually enjoy what they read here. Perhaps I've inspired some great self-pleasuring, a quick little couple nookie...or even caused some to start writing down their own sexual escapades and fantasies. That is what makes me feel good. I love sex and everything to do with it - and if I can help others enjoy sex in any way, shape, form or fashion, then I've done something I'm proud of.
So, to all who come and read - to all who come and check back faithfully even when I haven't posted in awhile - to each and every one that has linked to me - to those that have emailed me and commented - thank you. I really have been making plans to post a lot more often, and now there is even more incentive for that.
Now, go out there and give a loved one some good oral sex - or, if you're alone, take some time to give yourself a mind-blowing orgasm. And have a great weekend.
If I wake up with a slight moan, caress your arm and tell you I've been dreaming about having sex with you all night - what would your reaction be? If the next words out of my mouth are a low and breathless, "Baby, I want you," do you think we'd end up being late to work that morning?
My body knows what I need even more than my mind does. Last night I dreamed about sex all night.
The first dream I remember was being in a room with two blonde, naked chicks. We were all sitting on opposite sides of the room, and we were all extremely horny. Well, I knew I was and I assumed they were as well as they kept rubbing their clits and fucking themselves with vibrators. Good enough guess, eh? I kept wishing they would come over and get dirty with me, but none of us ever advanced towards making a move. Could this dream be a representation of sexual frustration???? Nah.
Next I dreamed I was at this huge house party; it appeared to be some type of rave. There were all these little Asian guys dressed like thugs walking around and one of them pushed me in a room. He was going to rape me, and at first I resisted a tad. But then I couldn't wait to feel his cock inside of me. Could this dream be about sexual desperation? Nah.
The other dream I had (yes, I swear, this was all in one night), involved me trying as hard as I could to get myself off with all my various toys and oils. I wanted to come so badly, but it wasn't happening. Could this dream be signifying the feeling of hopelessness that surrounds my sex life as of late? Nah.
This novice dream interpreter's diagnosis is - this nympho needs to get fucked hard!.
I promised details - and I always deliver.
Friday night arrived in a cacophony of mayhem - I had to work late and was, therefore, running late. I'd had possibly the most stressful work week of my life and was ready to kick back, relax, have a drink, and view some new sex toys (not necessarily in that order).
Oddly enough, I and my two friends arrived just on time. There were about 10 women there, most of whom I knew vaguely, and we all sat in a big circle in the living room around what, at first, appeared to be an alter to Aphrodite. It was covered in assorted bottles of oils and lotions and creams, and various other sexual playthings. The toys weren't out yet, but there was underwear and lingerie laid out as well.
The spiel was lightening quick and before the first 20 minutes were done, my hands and arms were covered in lotions and oils that served varying purposes, and my chest was aglow with glitter. We got to sample just about everything. I had the strangest taste in my mouth, since all of it was edible and I'd mixed it with my beer. There are oils and lotions for everything you can dream up. Like a Virgin was an oil that made your pussy tighten up for a tighter fit, there was one that numbed the back of your throat to kill your gag reflex, and even one that loosened up your asshole for anal penetration. I can't even remember half of what all I saw, there was such an assortment. It was a rich nympho's dream and a poor nympho like me's utter frustration. We took a short break as she picked up the bottles and laid out the real stars of the night - the toys.
I've never seen so many dildoes, vibrators, clit-suckers, butt plugs and weighted balls in all my life. I wanted one of everything. Of course, my meager paycheck does not allow for many sexually-oriented splurges, so I really had to get just what I desired the most.
Let me take the time now to introduce you all to my new friend who is as-yet-unnamed. His given name is the Jelly-Gyrating-Beaver and he's as fun as he sounds. I honestly wasn't going to buy a new vibrator. As I said, the one I have works just fine and is new. Yet as I sat there looking at the ones in front of me, I remembered that when I'm using a vibrator (outside of the tub) I always wished for something to also be vibrating on my clit. This is one of those deals you see with the little beaver on the top of the vibrator that stimulates your clit whilst the the other part is fucking you. I was in a mad rush to find batteries Saturday morning as soon as I woke up, and let me just say this about my new friend...wow. I really wasn't expecting it to be quite as good as it was. I'm sure you'll be hearing more about this new toy in posts to come.
The next purchase, that I'm equally as satisfied with, is a cream called Nympho Niagra. This was gotten on recommendation from the hostess of the party, a good friend and fellow-nympho-Scorpio. She raved about it, and I remembered another nympho-Scorpio friend telling me the same thing about the cream. I had to try this. As opposed to those warming-to-make-you-tingle lotions (which I'm not fond of) this is a cooling one. I will admit that I spent the better part of Saturday just rubbing this stuff on my clit and pussy while I went about doing my everyday chores. As soon as it would wear off, I'd dab on some more. It's listed as an "arousal stimulator" and I can say that I certainly was more aroused than even usual (which is really saying something). When P. dropped by to see my new toys and help me try them out, we were both amazed at just how much I came afterwards. I wasn't wet, I was sopping. So, if you can get some of this, do.
Not much else to report at this point. I've been playing with both of my purchases all weekend long, and as soon as money permits, intend to contact the saleslady and order a few more things. I promise to divulge any new and exciting exploits involving these new things...and you know, I always deliver.
A dear friend of mine created a mock resume for a male entertainer/trained satyr. I thought it was too funny, and thought you might enjoy it as well...
Objective
To entertain, and woo the hearts of all women.
Experience
1990–1994 Natural Mystic - Natchitoches, LASales Manager
Increased sales of cock rings by a quarterly average of 26%
Suggested new products that increased earnings by 23%.
Introduced new line of fetish videos of previously unknown genres, which increased sales by an annual average of 12%.
1985–1990 Leroy’s Escort Service - Horse Cave, KYSpokesman/Escort
Gained cliental by promoting myself in various shopping malls, super markets, and gas station bathrooms.
Introduced the “Kitty Cat/Pop Sickle” © technique. (see Skills below)
Was willing to compromise myself in order to obtain and secure customer relations.
Skills
Fully versed in the safe use of nipple clamps, duct tape, and the Double Trouble Sex Swing. Has full understanding of standard fire marshal codes for the state of Louisiana and Kentucky. Certified in C.P.R. Perfected the pleasurable technique known as the “Kitty Cat/Pop Sickle” © which bears my copyright. Is fully versed in all fetishes and has a full understanding of them with the exception of Golden Showers. Is willing to whore myself in the acquisition of liquid assets both domestic and foreign.
References
Candy Kane
Next Page »